All I have to say is ….. “Why,”….. The dreaded task we all lovingly know as work is trampled upon on a daily basis…. I don’t know why, I just know… we were getting ready to playing bridge once ( I know, I know… a lot of people laugh at that and …let’s see what expression should I attribute to this statement … Oh I know.. ) EXCLAIM “I didn’t know people play that anymore.” UGH…. YEAH!” Apparently I do… along with 3 other women… NO… You may not ask why… which brings me to the airheaded bimbo who lives behind me … lets call her “The Intruder,” who decided to attempt to take my place at bridge. When she asked where I was (the only fateful afternoon I was late)…and one of my partners replied “work”…. she countered with a “WHY,” accompanied with a look of dismay…. This shouldn’t come as a surprise to you but my neighbors are snobby rich bitches who worry more about their manicures than the possibility of global warming, nuclear meltdown, the end of the world as we know it, and the near extinction of man (give you some insight as to my neighbors?), not that you couldn’t figure it out by now.
Three Women: AKA bridge partners:
1. Who spends most of her day on the phone with her neighbor across the street talking about the rest of us…, Mildred.
2. Our plastic surgery dictionary…. Ruby… (Ex stripper who married the club-owner, divorced him for her first plastic surgeon), she’s had five kids, six tummy tucks, 3 breast augmentations, Jose the Gardner, one nose job, Pierre the Caterer, 2 cheek implants, Dennis the tennis pro, a chin, Bob the Golf Pro, and laser hair- removal all over her body ( she makes Mr. Bigglesworth , Dr. Evil’s Cat, look Hairy).
3. Dolores, Happy Homemaker (x-prom queen), room mother, sagging breast, who currently has an appointment with Ruby’s hubby (Dr. Tips) to fix them.
So When I arrived “The Intruder” looked miffed she’d be out of a bridge match and suggested we get another group of four women to join in …. “We could rotate tables, and play matches against each other!” ….. To which I replied, “WHY?”
YES, we’re a bunch of bitches, and proud of it!
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